Monday, May 21, 2012

A Rant Of Disappointment

Let's talk about ... DISAPPOINTMENT!

Disappointment is defined by me as letting oneself down; self sabotage; deliberate failure to one's own healthy objective.

WHY!? I don't know how many times I can ask myself this and think I have figured out the answer, but only I keep letting myself go back to bad habits. What is it going to take to get my butt to move forward?

I have felt so negative towards my losing weight, that I have really given up... my reason, oh I should just say excuses..

 I don't see the scale move down.... I get so frustrated.

If I had a great week and I worked so hard and then only to gain ... I feel like "trying" is  just a slap in my face.

What's left.... especially when I am not succeeding?

I having such a tough time with this lately and I can't seem to give myself strength to push forward through this moment.

I went shopping this past weekend with my friends to get our last minute cute clothes, and what I wanted was not in my size. It was a pretty disappointing shopping trip and of course I blame myself. This shopping trip could have been so much more fun if I had kept with my challenge/goal. I can't blame anyone for that, it was my responsibility; my goal.

I need to learn to deal with everyday life. Everyone has to deal with it, I am no exception, I need to learn how to deal with it better and openly instead of trying to squash my feelings and quit feeling so overwhelmed with little things that aren't important.

I just don't know......

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