Sunday, November 13, 2011

Eating Junk=Emotional Distress

I have been eating junk!

That's my confession. No difference in weight change, which would be great if I was thin and healthy before. A huge downfall is that I can feel the emotional changes with what I eat. Junk food gives me a quick high, but just as that high comes, the emotions set in quickly too. Which are usually guilt for eating all of it or disgust for eating all of it. Laziness sets in too which does not give the energy I need to play with my daughter. I get moody towards my husband. Everything  begins irritate me and I know I am no fun to be around.

Also, physical changes start up. All day long, from the minute I wake up to the time I go to sleep, my back aches. I have gone to Curves about two times the past week and it was like pulling teeth; I didn't want to do it or even take the energy to go, but I went, but never push myself 100%!

It's pitiful! I didn't gain any pounds but I did gain so many headaches along the way! It affected me in other ways and not for the better. I am going to recommit myself to starting new today!

I don't like the way I feel and body aches and worse I'm grumpy all the time. I have restarted my soda addiction and basically forgot I need to drink water. So I'm going cold turkey once again and  avoiding soda. That's my major concentration for this week. I dread going without soda, but it's a step that I need to take!

Thursday, November 3, 2011

If I can, You can too...

"If I can, You can too..." I just heard these words and they came from my husband... REALLY?
How about this one, again from my husband... "You just have to try..." SERIOUSLY?

He's been changing his habits, which is great, because I thought he would have a hard time doing this, since his job takes him on the road on a daily basis. He's lost about 5 lbs in about a week. Which of course I am VERY proud of him, and totally jealous of his 5 lb weight loss, but his words stung more than just a bit!

"Are you saying I'm not trying....uggggghhh... COME ON!" That's what I said to him, but maybe, just maybe he has a point.... maybe.

Maybe I haven't been giving it my all. Just what more do I have to give? Is there anymore to give? What and where am I lacking?

Too many questions, I'm giving myself a headache.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Fear And Frustration

I wish I could say, hey I've lost  20 lbs since the last time I blogged on here, but the fact is I haven't lost anything! Oh frustration has set in and I'm at my witts end! My month on weight watchers was a no go for me. Counting points is just not for me. I truly believe if I went to meetings it might be different.

The last post in October was about my family being overweight. The days are just zooming on by and before I know it, the holidays will be right around the corner and I feel as if we will need to prepare for dooms day and this shouldn't have to be the case for us.

I'm having trouble getting myself back on track. I am apparently maintaining a three pound gain and three pound loss. This would be great, if I was at my goal weight! I'm unmotivated and feel pressure on myself to get my family involve with getting healthy! I honestly don't know where to begin! Life seems to be a little more complicated lately and I feel as I can't take control of situations and when I feel as I have no control, I feel as I might explode into a billion of unidentifiable pieces!

Maybe I'm making excuses for fear of succeeding; but who does that? It's what I want; I want to succeed and I want my family to succeed! I've asked myself these questions many times before but I don't ever have the answer. I have to delve deep into my self conscience and who knows what might come to surface.

Something's gotta give!