GRRRR!

I'm lacking something today. What is it?

M-O-T-I-V-A-T-I-O-N.

I'm frustrated today. It's just one of those days. I feel as I've been tired all day. I feel as if I have eaten everything in sight. I'm easily irritated and could just scream out of annoyance!

I've been looking at my many diet books and I fill my head up with all this information and I become overwhelmed. What am I searching for in these books? Sometimes I will read and re-read to see what I'm missing or try to figure out why didn't THIS diet didn't work for ME? Or maybe I just want that quick fix and don't want to accept that dieting and working out go hand in hand to reach success.

Deep breath.... relax.... deep breath..... I may call it an early night!

Photographs

You ever notice, when there's a special occasion or just something we want to capture for a memory we snap a picture. Isn't there an expression that says a picture is worth a thousand words? The eye is in the beholder. This beholder doesn't like being in pictures, and the reason is I hate looking at myself. The critical part of me jumps right in while looking at the picture.

"Boy, I look really fat."
"Looks like I have a fat suit on."
"Couldn't I lift my head a little more, so I don't have to see a DOUBLE chin."

(Don't Get Me Started... I could go on and on.)

I'm not usually in many photographs just so that I won't look back and be critical of myself. It's sad to see a photograph and not be able to see beyond the "fat" me. I should be able to look at the picture and smile, thinking...."This was great day. I remember we were there together and I had a blast." I am going to have to rethink my view on photographs. My first step is to start being in photographs more often and remember the occasion, the company, and the joy I felt inside.

SUPPER!

Well, day 5 on cooking supper. What was I thinking when I added this to my weekly goals? Today is FRIDAY... should be a day of going out to eat and enjoying SLICES of pizza or a HUGE hamburger. A day to forgive and forget about cooking dinner at home.

RIGHT? WRONG!

I didn't go out to eat. I promise! Instead, I made a delicious "Pita Pizza" with very little sauce, covered with onion, red bell pepper, jalapeno, mozzarella cheese and turkey pepperoni on a whole wheat pita. YUM!

SIMPLE SUPPER!

Simple as it can get... breakfast for supper. Let me begin by saying... the camera's batteries are dead. No picture to share today. Sorry! Let me see in how many words I can describe my breakfast supper. I used egg whites and one yolk; scrambled to my liking and had 2 slices of center cut bacon (plus one to snack on). I used 2 corn tortillas and began my breakfast taco combination. A little avocado with chopped tomato and a squeeze of lemon. It sounds strange.... but it was good! I call this dish the ...... that's-what-I-had-in-my-fridge-and-I-haven't-gone-to-the-grocery-store-yet-meal!!!

On a different note.... YEAH! MY WEEKEND HAS BEGUN! SLEEPING IN AND LOUNGING AROUND....ahhhh sounds heavenly.... WISHFUL THINKING!

DAY THREE!

Talapia with brown rice, sauteed bell pepper, onion, tomato and jalapeno.

Alright, so I'm not in the mood to cook today, but I did cook. Supper was something simple with the help of the microwave to heat up some minute brown rice and heat up a small piece of talipia. Now this is where it gets fishy. I don't usually eat fish unless it's tuna out of a can. I didn't complain. I ate half of the fish, not too bad, (Not so sure about microwable fish??). I was still hungry so I had a thin piece of leftover meatloaf (very thin slice) from yesterday's supper.

Perhaps eating fish at least once a week will be a good thing. Hmmm, maybe?

ON A ROLL!

Annaleigh's Supper Request!

Can you believe it? Day two in cooking at home. Even this impresses me. Annaleigh's request for supper was meatloaf. Of course, this meatloaf was completely modified; substituted oats for crackers or bread crumbs and my binding ingredient, egg whites. Our sides, mash potatoes, and green beans. I had no complaints. My poor soon to be hubby, isn't at home to enjoy this dish. He's heading to Wisconsin as I type away at the keyboard! I'm proud of my day two meal. It might not be so healthy with the mash potatoes, but it's my portion control that I think matters. I didn't even go back for seconds. I ate slowly and I savored each bite. YUM!

Great Dinner Start!

Day One

I'm off to a great start with my goal for this week; cooking dinner and adding a healthy veggie! Supper was a  simple pork chop, roasted (medium) potato wedges and roasted broccoli with a sprinkle of low fat cheddar cheese. It was, (I have to admit) quite tasty!

WEEKLY GOALS

My goal for the week is to aim for a 2 lb. loss by Sunday. My other goal is to PREPARE my lunch menu for the week so that I won't be tempted into accepting the girls fast food lunch-run during this week!  My last goal to aim for this week is to cook delicious suppers EVERY evening. (MEAL MUST HAVE A HEALTHY VEGETABLE AND IF THERE IS A DESSERT CHOICE, IT MUST BE HEALTHY!) Wish me luck.

I'm usually good at making up goals, but as for following one closely. Unfortantely I don't do so well. So I'm holding you responisble this week. Please help me to keep up with these three goals!

FINALLY FRIDAY!

Since Tuesday, I have been calling to Friday. It's been a hectic week and now I can kick off my shoes to relax. This week I have actually put in effort into working out at Curves. Very proud of myself and deserve a nice pat on the back! Annaleigh and I have even gone to the park to play some basketball. She had me working hard, which is great. (Poor Mark is working out of town, won't be home until next week!)

Again, whew, so glad it's Friday! But wait! Weekends in my mind are days to mindlessly snack! This might be tricky for me. I need to divert my attention. I need to realize when I'm hungry and when I'm not! I want to weigh in on Sunday and know I have stopped my self-sabotaging! That's my goal for the weekend. I am going to keep my eye on my goal. NO MINDLESS SNACKING!

PROMISES! PROMISES!

Why is it that I'm always ready to make promises and keep promises to everyone else, but to myself? This "GO HEALTHY PLAN" is really harder then I thought.  I've just started this week and already I'm blowing it! Where is my will power? My motivation?

FOCUS GIRL! FOCUS!

Yesterday, Annaleigh and I went to the Barnes and Noble. She was insistent on getting a book that she just had to have and I was going to encourage reading books. She's not a book worm like her mother, but I hope to get her there. I, on the other hand, found myself in the health section, again. I always end up there. It's rows and rows of diet information. A book filled with promises to get me thin! What I really need to do is keep FOCUSING on getting healthy! I PROMISE to focus!

Fear Of Success?

I've been wondering about my reasons for being overweight and not being able to stay on the many diets I have put myself through. Of course I have had success, but then I find myself coming to a plateau and I know secretly it was self-sabotaging for the sake of the unknown. I know how to be fat and live my everyday life.  Being Fat, I have to be clever, and work a little harder to get from point A to point B!  I have to let my personality outshine, so people can see that I'm not just BIG.  As ridiculous as I sound, my fear is that I wouldn't know how to be thin and live life. Once in a while, I catch a glimpse as I slowly feel my pants a little looser and I like that I have that extra energy to focus on important people or things, that extra attention when someone says, "Wow, you look great!" It's exciting and welcoming at first, then I slip on my diet, then I'm too tired to workout.  Fear of success, is that really possible?  Or am I the odd one out?

Inspired To Begin!

I have been inspired by Blogs that describe their success in weight loss and their struggles in weight loss and I'm encourage to begin my own Weight Therapy Blog. I feel that I will be able to understand my own issues with my weight! Blogging will be my way of expressing myself and accept myself for who I am. As unrealistic as I may be, I still want to be able to eat delicious food! Of course having a  male and a kid in the house who seem to be hungry for sweets will be a challenge on a different level. I believe in order to have weightloss success, my family is going to eat what I eat and we'll need to become active as a family!

Now then, my next step is to set goals. Goals is what lets us reap the rewards for our accomplishments! For every 10 lbs. lost, a reward that doesn't involve food! A weekly weigh in and photograph at the end of the month.

*I currently weigh 260!!! I have been fluctuating from to 255 to 260 for the past few months! It's driving me crazy! If I were to check the average woman who is 5'3, a large frame... she would weigh  141. A future goal? Possibly! But a more realistic goal for me is to get away from the 200's!

*Another goal would be working out at Curves. I'm a member since last June of 2010. I need to recommit to my workouts! At least 3 times a week! I moan and groan about it, but once I'm there I feel refreshed and less stressful! Including a new family activity for the week!

*I need to drink the recommended 8 glasses of water. (Now, this I should be able to handle! Back in October I joined a group of ladies in a fit club and gave up almost all caffeinated beverages! As of to date I long to have a carbonated drink, but the taste of Coke, Dr. Pepper, Pepsi, Root Beer are disgusting!)

* How about having home cooked meals.(Although, I'm a sucker for fast food for dinner, because it's easy and I can use coupons at a bargin price! I could tell you what day and what restaurant is having a deal for the week. I'm guilty as charged; as a parent I should know better!)

I raise my glass (water, of course) for a toast!

HERE'S TO ME! HERE'S TO YOU! LET THE JOURNEY BEGIN WITH VICTORY!